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twilighter

`Clara...
`18
`on the verge of falling
`fallen___and dead!!!

`addicted to the perfection of___
zac efron!
edward cullen!

When you can live forever, what do you live for?

listening


无重力~


bella's lullaby~

eclipse


WishingUponTheStars

`ubrightenupmydae,livenmyspiritsncompletemylife!o3o42oo8

`really
`what i wish will really come true,
pls, at least for once_____
`give in my very best for studies
`ENERGY to come back_____
i really need it!
` me to be me again.


our memories
; February 2007
; March 2007
; April 2007
; May 2007
; July 2007
; August 2007
; September 2007
; October 2007
; November 2007
; April 2008
; May 2008
; June 2008
; July 2008
; August 2008
; September 2008
; October 2008
; November 2008
; January 2009
; February 2009
; March 2009
; April 2009
; May 2009
; June 2009
; July 2009
; August 2009
; September 2009
; October 2009
; November 2009
; December 2009
; March 2010


belong together
`lin feng
`xiao zhu_luo zhi xiang
`wuchun
`aaron
`jiro
`calvin
`xiao gui

`shan
`dilys
`meiqi
`xinni
`zoey
`neu syhan
`yanhong
`tlcn
`serene
`mei ting
`kai xian
`zhong ri



murmured words







breaking dawn
designer: veronicanote
basecodes:xrated.


credits for youtube for the wonderful lullaby. =)

`entry 54 regrets

`addicted___因为我爱上你了 9:19 PM

24`o6`2oo9


it has been a real long time since the last time i was here.
haix. so many things happen with the ticking of the clock,
and the changing of high tides to low tides of the sea.
in fact, there is nothing much that can be done to change the fact..
or to change the results of something...
NOTHING CAN BE DONE.
i have been feeling so helpless recently..
start to think if i am that lousy.
i need people out there to constantly tell me that i am doing the right thing.
making the correct decision,
and walking in the correct direction.
i cant afford to lose my way any now and then.
when you no longer had the power within you to trust yourself,
or rather you lost your confidence...
you seek alternatives to make yourself feel right.
that is exactly what i am doing..
am i really so lousy now???
i am somehow lost in the midst and cant get out.
i cant see the path in front of me, so i need help!
some told me how rocky the path is, some told me despite the obstacles,
there will be a nice scenery in front waiting..
so no matter how tough the route is, it will be worth taking.
so which one is real? which one can i believe in?
i really cant afford to fall! i dont want to fall.
i had been falling all these times and i know how hurtful it is.
but from what i know.. that is the best path i have now.
i do not live anything to my name..
so i have to make a decision to change it.
this decision to make carries a significant impact!
huge impact.
am i making the right choice??
there was once someone who told me this...
` there is actually a lot of choices in life..
different choices will lead to different future.
life is always unfair and full of mystery..
you wont know how the scenery in front look like until you take a step forward.
so you must always be daring enough to take that step..
every step is worth taking,
cause you will get to see and know something new.
dont consider too much about alternatives...
alternatives are meant to be there to show you which is the correct decision to make.
dont be afraid of having alternatives.
always try to make the best out of the current situation.
then that is the best decision.
the opportunity cost is just the cost if the next best alternatives forgone.
and you wont know it unless you calculate it,
so dont calculate it.
there are just so many choices in life. dont get so messed up with it.
trust your instincts and you will know where to go, what to choose.
trust yourself. if you never trust yourself, then who will be there to trust you.
you will feel helpless when no one trust you._____
this speech is so true. i totally understand it..
but where are my instincts now? i have lost them and cant feel any thing at all.
i will make the best out of the things i have now..
i swear that i will.
to believe that i can.
at least i am trying to...

`just need someone to constantly tell me that i am right_____


`entry 53 passing by

`addicted___因为我爱上你了 4:35 PM

o1`o6`2oo9

like sometimes like this,
it is still warm when someone wish you wellness.
and believe in everything you do.
thanks for all that.
i really appreciated it.
heartwarming!

`glad to know that i am not neglected_____


`entry 52 giving up

`addicted___因为我爱上你了 10:34 AM

o1`o6`2oo9

is giving up really an easier way out??
i have been stuck inside this and somehow think that i am suffocated by all these.
this is not a very good feeling i can say.
but!! can someone just pull me out of all these things i am suffering?
i might die from all these.
cant even sleep well.
haix. i wish i can just dont need to bother and think of all these things..
but i just cant keep myself away from it!
everything just came crushing down on me.
the impact is so large and deadly.
i could hardly pull the bits and fragments of myself together.
sometimes, it is true that people will go to any length to delude themselves.
but i am now going to any length to glue myself together.
do you know how bad it feels when people are asking you where will you be going to,
when you do not really know where?
i am dying from all these.
it's kind of hard to reply.
as in i know this might be a form of concern,
but what i really need now may be consoling instead.

`do you understand_____