24`o6`2oo9


it has been a real long time since the last time i was here.
haix. so many things happen with the ticking of the clock,
and the changing of high tides to low tides of the sea.
in fact, there is nothing much that can be done to change the fact..
or to change the results of something...
NOTHING CAN BE DONE.
i have been feeling so helpless recently..
start to think if i am that lousy.
i need people out there to constantly tell me that i am doing the right thing.
making the correct decision,
and walking in the correct direction.
i cant afford to lose my way any now and then.
when you no longer had the power within you to trust yourself,
or rather you lost your confidence...
you seek alternatives to make yourself feel right.
that is exactly what i am doing..
am i really so lousy now???
i am somehow lost in the midst and cant get out.
i cant see the path in front of me, so i need help!
some told me how rocky the path is, some told me despite the obstacles,
there will be a nice scenery in front waiting..
so no matter how tough the route is, it will be worth taking.
so which one is real? which one can i believe in?
i really cant afford to fall! i dont want to fall.
i had been falling all these times and i know how hurtful it is.
but from what i know.. that is the best path i have now.
i do not live anything to my name..
so i have to make a decision to change it.
this decision to make carries a significant impact!
huge impact.
am i making the right choice??
there was once someone who told me this...
` there is actually a lot of choices in life..
different choices will lead to different future.
life is always unfair and full of mystery..
you wont know how the scenery in front look like until you take a step forward.
so you must always be daring enough to take that step..
every step is worth taking,
cause you will get to see and know something new.
dont consider too much about alternatives...
alternatives are meant to be there to show you which is the correct decision to make.
dont be afraid of having alternatives.
always try to make the best out of the current situation.
then that is the best decision.
the opportunity cost is just the cost if the next best alternatives forgone.
and you wont know it unless you calculate it,
so dont calculate it.
there are just so many choices in life. dont get so messed up with it.
trust your instincts and you will know where to go, what to choose.
trust yourself. if you never trust yourself, then who will be there to trust you.
you will feel helpless when no one trust you._____
this speech is so true. i totally understand it..
but where are my instincts now? i have lost them and cant feel any thing at all.
i will make the best out of the things i have now..
i swear that i will.
to believe that i can.
at least i am trying to...

`just need someone to constantly tell me that i am right_____