28`12`2oo9
just realised how long since i last blogged...
has been a month!
haix.. this one month.
so many things happened.
despite things happening, i still failed to learnt any lessons.
FAILED to be a better friend.
FAILED to be a better person..
sometimes things are just so amazing...
at a certain period of time, you can be so closely tied with your friend.
but still.. there are still moments whereby you start to think.
start to ponder!!!
i WILL!! i was like thinking and thinking about it.
i dont understand how relationships can be so bizzare.
you can also be VERY VERY closed with someone..
but! at the other moment, ties can just severed like that!
i dont like the feeling.... DONT LIKE!
is there any solution to salvage this?!
i do not want this to become like that!!
evrything is like in a deep shit! total mess.
on top of it... i somehow felt like i am drifted away...
DRIFTED AWAY from everything that once belonged to me..
or rather things i thought that meant so dearly to me...
how come things can just drift away like that!? getting further and further.
the feeling is so distant.. how can i ever overcome it...
it's so hard.. no matter how hard i try,
i dont see any improvements....
no matter how tight i am grasping, things are still so intangible as they were....
again.. the lousy feeling came back...
have not been getting that feeling....
but somehow it just came back. or is it i am avoiding it in the first place..
pretending to be unconscious of it.
but as it become so obvious and noticable, i will have to come out of the pretense..

`might just break down one day_____